There are chances that you have been through at least one breakup in your life. It is not at all easy and since we are wired up with things and a desire for connection traps us that breaking up with a partner becomes difficult.
There are a host of reasons for the breakup and it is believed that the background and experience with relationships, in general, might dictate the behavior during the course of a breakup. People make the biggest mistakes while trying to end their relationships and this has a negative impact on the mind and on their relationships.
There are no specific rules for breakups as each of the breakups is for different reasons. It is really helpful to know what you should not be doing, especially in the emotionally confusing state of your mind will be in when you lose someone you really care about.
For some of us, the experience is most emotional when we lose our first love. The first love in everyone’s life is the first experience at learning about romantic love and the ways to navigate the joys and challenges of love and how to experience relationship loss.
For many of us, the loss of first love is for the first time one experiences the physical and psychological symptoms of grief and loss. Breaking up a relationship is really hard for the person who chose to pull the plug on the relationship and it is hard for the person who is broken up with.
Breakups are Really Hard and is So Painful
The truth is that if you expect a break up to happen you can completely deal with the emotions that might hit you. These emotions range from confusion, hurt, anger, frustration, and deep sadness. Each day you might feel some new negative emotions and will just do anything to suppress your pain.
Breakups are so hard due to the fact that they are the death of something that was precious to you. The pain and emotions one experiences at that time are the feelings of loss and can be compared to grief.
You are in the sorrow of the death of your hopes for the future with the person and all the plans you made. The entire world has been turned upside down and hopes turned to ashes. You are now forced out of your comfort zone and you feel insecure and hurt. This happens when you experience negative emotions like depression, self-doubt, and hopelessness for the future. We should in a positive way deal with a breakup rather than negative ways.
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Constructive Ways of going through Breakups vs Destructive Ways
Breakups are really hard and are really difficult to overcome in the long term. A breakup should give you an opportunity for growing further rather than allowing you to go into depression and set you back in life.
We have seen numerous instances in life that when someone is hurt, they turn to drugs or alcohol. They might even spend the endless night partying and might enter into relationships that they actually did not want. The fact is that you might get short term relief and be away from distractions but this pays a negative effect on the long term goals.
Let us take an example. You have got specific goals and want to make the best at your job. Since your heart is broken you feel awful and indulge in taking drugs and partying outside. Due to this, you will have a hangover every morning. This will definitely hinder your efficiency at work and reach your professional goals. If this becomes a habit, it will become a problem later. You should have fun but not at the cost of your efficiency in professional work.
Setting Goals: Go Through a Breakup
You should always work on being goal oriented. Set short term and long term goals for being goal oriented.
You should set short term goals so that work becomes simple and you compliment yourself every day. While dealing with a difficult breakup it is time to change your routine. Try to do something different like rock climbing, yoga, painting, etc. Keep on doing new things every week to remain energized and fit. By keeping a goal in mind alone will help you to get out of the current situation. While trying to do things, do not distract from your goal.
Important Thing to do while Getting over a Breakup
While you are surrounded by negative thoughts, you might have gone through a bad breakup. This is going to exaggerate if you isolate yourself and allow yourself to stay at home.
You can overcome negative thoughts only by keeping yourself active the whole day. To cope with a breakup, it is essential to start implementing proper exercise and action in your life so as to increase your self-confidence.
Try to go to a gym and try a different workout routine. This will enable a smooth flow of endorphins in the body and boost your energy. You will feel light, energetic, and happy. You will be surprised to see that physical exercise plays a great role in the overall mood.
Think about all the pleasant things that happened when you were in relationships. You might have stopped spending your time with your friends and family when the relationship was the top priority. You might have set aside some of your hobbies and passions. Try to focus your time on these things again.
Get Over a Breakup by getting in with the New and out with the Old
It is better to change the environment. Staying in the same environment will remind your ex. All around the place, you will be thinking about the past.
Change the things and places that belong to your ex. Try to remove all the things that remind you of your ex. Keep them out of your sight. Change the furniture and the surrounding of the place of your stay. This will give you a positive effect on your mind also. You can also give a new look and feel to the surrounding and this will make you active.
Get over a breakup by separating out
After a painful breakup, challenge yourself and talk to new people every week. You can talk to anyone whether it is a person in a grocery store, someone at a party or someone sitting next to you on the bus.
Try to move out of your comfort zone and mingle with people. Meeting new people will help you in broadening your new horizons. You should remember that you are not dependent on your ex. to remain happy. You should introduce new things in your life to bring joy.
Make your Well Being a Top Priority to overcome Breakup
During breakup ensure you maintain good health and give it a top priority. Of course, you have all right to get angry and upset, get hurt but it should not affect your health. After breakup whenever you wish to make a call to your ex., just call any of your best friends and talk to them. You can even make a plan to go out and enjoy it. A breakup does not mean that you do not have the right to be happy.
While you are taking proper care of your health, think and analyze what went wrong and if things can be sorted out if you want the relationship back.
Coping with a Breakup if you want your ex Back
If you decide to cope up with breakup and want your ex back then grab the courage and let your partner know how deeply you loved. Admitting your mistake in the first place will improve your relationship and remember to nurture it with love and care.
Conclusion:
Never take any decision in haste. Sit and think calmly and coolly and only then come to a final decision. This will help in saving many of your relationships whether it is personal or friendship.
Also Read: What Did You Learn From Previous Relationships?