There surely comes a time in your life when you realize a better person whom you thinking where all this time were not the right one for you. Here it is not about the partner but a friend. A toxic friendship can be a toxin for your entire life. There are times when you would think that your so-called friend of yours is not so good maybe because of the bad influence or the dominating behavior. You may be the person trying to loosen up your confidence level or making your life difficult every time. At such a moment, it is the time that you realize that stopping these things right away is important.
It does not matter which kind of relationship you are in, always remember, if it creating toxins in your life it surely will ruin everything. Being in a relationship does not mean you have to manage it only alone. You must focus on creating a healthy relationship that would bring positivity. The same goes for sharing a bond with your friend. That is why you must take the right actions if you think you are in a negative friendship and needs to move on before it is too late.
What exactly is A Toxic Friendship?
Before understanding the way to move out from the negative friendship, you need to be first clear on understanding what exactly is a toxic friendship or is it the relationship bothering you. As per some of the experts studying such relations stated any person who is quite negative and competitive may resist sabotaging the growth. These are the people who can have different motives. Some of them can even think that you don’t need them in your life any longer since you have met a better person. In short, selfishness and mean behavior may not be just the thing of insecurity of your friend but also finding other friends can also be the reason for this toxicity.
At the end of the day, it is your friend and you surely have to take the right step for saving the relationship or maintaining a distance. That is why, if you think the bond of friendship which you are sharing is not keeping you happy but making you suffocated the most, it is time for you to walk out of it. This is important not just for you but also for the other person to value the relationship so that in future that person will not treat anyone like this.
- Realization Is The First Step Of Everything
Before you make your friend realize about parting ways, you first need to digest that letting things go is also okay. When it comes to being a friend with the person who has been dominating you but still you have a soft heart, it can be quite challenging. It is normal for you to feel that you are the one cheating on the friendship. But frankly, if things are not working out well, then it does not make any point even to continue it. That is why, you must focus on first letting off go things. It would be great if things can let go in much natural matter but if you have to work on it extra then make sure you don’t take unnecessary time.
- Realize That Healthy Relationships Matters
Being in the toxic friendship will cause nothing but damage to you and hurt your family and loved ones. That is why it is always better that you focus on improving life by eliminating all those things including a toxic friendship that slowly is killing you. It can be often like drugs or smokes which you may find to be addicting and will not do anything instantly but as you start taking it and get addicted to it, you will realize that it is harming you but you don’t have any control on it. That is why; it is always helpful for you to focus on creating a healthy relationship that you need to have. You must consider the relation with being a person who can walk with you to grow and not stop your growth. If you have a friend who is not just happy with your success and always de-motivate you then it is a warning that you must now walk out from it.
- Don’t Stew In Your Bitterness
It can often be quite challenging for you to come on the terms with a bad friend. After all, this person was expected to be with you at a crucial time but failed to do so. It can always be quite heavy. It is always important to let go of things and bitterness frankly can damage you and the other person internally. You need to forgive the person and understand the fact that he or she was never your friend from the start and that is why expecting them to be there with you when needed does not make sense. Once you realize that you can free yourself from any kind of guilt and move on.
- Are You Waiting For An Apology? Don’t Wait
‘Sorry’ is an easy word but when you want to hear it always the person knows that it is all that matters. Frankly, they don’t understand what is your expectation when they do something wrong. That is why, if you have one such friend who has been hurting you always and the next day ends up saying sorry and expect you to move on then that is bad. You need to realize that your friend is never going to value this relationship. You must not always wait for their sorry because they don’t mean any of it at all. They will continue to repeat the mistakes and hurt you always. Instead, you take hold and give yourself a better push to walk out of this friendship with dignity.
- Other Friends Can Help You
To get out of the toxic friendship is as equal to breaking up with your partner who was not keeping you happy. Well, be considerate of the fact that it is not that one friend you had. There are so many more that can help you in your bad time and be with you in your good times. Talking of which when you want to get yourself out of the toxic friendship, you might want to get help from other friends. Always reach out to your loved ones who can always give better support and tell you why you need to end this friendship. The toxic partners and toxic friends are those two internal mistakes that we understand have happened but no one expects you can rectify. That is why, to make yourself strong, asking other friends to help you is okay.
- It Is Time For You To Move On!
You have tried all the best possible measures to make your friend realize the mistake. But as you can see the outcome remains the same. Your friend still behaves in a way that can hurt you. But that does not mean necessarily you have to bare it all. Rather, you can simply move on and frankly, it indeed is a time that you must move on. You can end talking to them and try on yourself how long you can continue doing that. The best way to stop this toxin to ruin you is just by moving on yourself and realizing the fact that you deserve better and nothing else.
- It Is Okay To Feel Bad!
You don’t have to be going through all the torture whenever you can take care of it. You don’t have to be strong and hard like stone. It is okay to burst out and cry. You can be emotional about this friendship. After all, you guys did create and share some great memories and bonding too. But don’t let it win all over you. You have to be strong but also you leaving your friendship at times can be dramatic. You can see your friend occasionally but contacting them often does not make sense. So make yourself strong about this and move ahead.
- Reduce Contact Every Day
At times, to get out of this toxic friendship may not be that easy. You may have to struggle a lot. But frankly, you can do it all well. You need to understanding that reducing contact with your friend is the only way out. You might see your friend dropping by your house all of a sudden. Well, you must avoid all of it. Let the person realize and digest that you don’t want to continue this friendship and hence you are trying to reduce the contact. There will come a saturation point when your friend will also move on. It is then okay to have contact with him or her once in a blue moon but not often otherwise, things that you did all this time to get out of such toxic relationship will be all a waste and you will be again stuck in the same old thing.
- Brief Conversation Is Important
To be precise, to end the friendship which has been hampering you, make sure you get some time with that friend. You need to have a good conversation on what made you feel these things and how much negativity is hampering you. Address them their mistakes without considering them to apologize for it. You don’t owe them anything and so you don’t need to give them any explanation, either should you be listening to one. It is important that you simply let them know that you are done with their friendship and you want to move ahead in your life.
- A Letter Can Be Good
At times, being an emotional and sensitive person can be quite difficult to let go of things so easily. You might know that you are living in a world of friends who don’t respect you that you deserve. And that is when if you don’t want to face them or you are a little scared then it is okay to simply drop off a letter to them and write all your thoughts whatever is running in your mind. At times to jot down the feeling is the best way as it gives you much more time to think. It is also important to give yourself a chance to edit out some of the mean things which you think can hurt the opposite person.
- Learn And Move
Always remember the reflection of what you have gone through will be there with you always. It is that is why important to keep your friendship with others in a respectful manner. But every friendship even the negative one teaches some of the other lessons. It is okay to stop continuing the friendship that has been hampering you. Don’t simply move out of the relation. Whatever you have learned make sure you don’t report it with anyone neither let anyone dominate you at all.
Also Read: How Friendship Changes Over Time
- Few Things You Should Try
Avoid calling them frequently. If you had been texting like three times a day the make it three times a week then three times a month and then once in a blue moon. If you think that this can be a little awkward and tricky since you guys have the same group then limit down your catch-ups with that particular group so that your interaction can be avoided. Ending a friendship on the spot can never be easy. It should end healthily and fading it out is the best thing. If not then make your heart stubborn and comfort right in front of them and tell them that it is all over.